If you only knew the depth of my love. I have gushed about you in a video (shared below). I've told your birth story in other letters, and I have talked about how much you make me proud. And more recently, I have heard you say to Daddy, "Mommy likes to hug me and tell me she loves me all the time." It's true. But I'd like to give you a little insight into why.
You are a breath of fresh air. When the world around me doesn't make sense, your innocence and zest for life is beautiful. There is so much about you I just admire. And it's not because you got it from me or your Daddy. It's because it is you.
I have seen you grow up so much in the past year, that I am in complete awe. Sure, you still act your age and have tantrums periodically and you tell us No and sass us. All normal things. But, when I see how much you care for other people, and how you want to pray for the bad people who took Mommy's purse. Or the way you even pray that Jesus has a good day. Or how you want to know what God eats. Or how you ask about how things are made or done and just trust that Mommy has the answer (I don't always). How you have faith that if someone is sick, that all we have to do is pray and God will help them. Your faith is exactly as God wants us all to have in Him. You have taught me so many lessons in my own life!
The way you love your sister and the way you take care of her is incredible. You are truly the best big brother I have ever seen. You took to her instantly and that first night, you had us in tears watching you reading to her. I have not seen a big brother act so beautifully as you do with her. Alexandria is incredibly blessed to have you as her big brother, and I am so thankful she has someone as strong-willed and compassionate as you on her side. I know that as you both grow up, she will always have an advocate in you, and that's special.
You are incredibly polite and say please and thank you, even when I wouldn't expect you to say it. How sometimes you even say "I'm so proud of you Mommy!" It's so sweet. You always seem to know how to turn me into putty! I don't know how many times you have put your arms around me and just told me you loved me or that I was the best Mommy, and you just melt me. I am the one that is blessed to have you as my son!
You have learned some tough lessons this year in pre-K where you had to learn patience and waiting your turn, and now you just do it. This time last year, we would get frustrated with you because you didn't want to wait and you would throw a tantrum. But pre-K helped you learn some of those things. How you are so sociable with anyone who is at a playground and you instantly call them your friends. You have learned how to write your name, you can write all the letters of the alphabet lower and uppercase, and you can count literally all the way to 100. We can tell you are more number oriented just by how easy numbers and very basic math are to you. You get most of that from your Daddy. You have learned the sounds of each of the letters, and you are starting to learn some very basic words. We will learn more this summer for sure!
You are so loyal to your family. I like to think you got some of that from me. You don't let anyone mess with your sister, and if you think I am even being "unreasonable" with her, you tell me. Or when you told me about how you yelled at the "bad guy" that took my purse, and when I asked you if you were scared, you said "No! I was just so mad that he took your purse. It wasn't his and I yelled really loud at him and told him that!" No one messes with your family! You are super protective of us.
You are very open with your feelings, and make sure you let us know if your feelings are hurt, if you are mad, if you are sad, if you are frustrated, etc. These are good things. And I want you to know, you can always trust us with your feelings. Always! We try to make sure that you always have an outlet and feel like we hear your feelings. We may not agree with everything you say, but we will always hear you out and what you have to say to us. Always.
You have grown up even in the food you eat. You used to be the pickiest eater ever. But now you eat most things you are given at school. We have learned you don't like the school's eggs or sausage, but that's okay. You don't have to like everything. But your favorite food is still pizza! No doubt about it! I kind of blame myself on that because when I was pregnant with you, I ate A LOT of pizza. It was so bad that even you Daddy got tired of how much pizza we were eating! Haha!
I just adore you, my sweet boy. Even when you are in trouble or acting out, the maturity in you has gotten so that you always, and I do mean always come out and apologize for your behavior. You can't stand being mad at us for too long, and honestly, we don't like being mad at you either. And there have been times where we were the ones that messed up and had to apologize to you. We aren't perfect...not by a long shot. We make mistakes. But what's so amazing is when we say we are sorry, you always tell us you forgive us. I love this open communication we have, and I have to say, I don't look forward to the teenage years because usually that is when communication is lacking. But, I want you to know, there isn't a single thing you could say to us that would change our love for you. Not a single thing. Even if we disagree with you, we will ALWAYS love you. Always! So try to remember this when you become a teenager.
I have so much I look forward to doing with you in the future. And yet, there is a part of me that wants you to stay little forever. But, I know God has incredible things in your future. How do I know this? When the odds were against you even being conceived, you were! God made YOU happen! He told a family friend about you before we even knew for sure if we would ever have you. You were always a promised son! I had your name in my head since I was young. And it was no accident because Caleb was always going to be your name. But it was funny, and God confirmed this in a dream to your Daddy, but He changed your middle name to Isaac. Mommy initially thought of Michael. But, because of all we went through to even having you, Isaac is way more appropriate. And someday, you will understand why we say that. Sarah and Abraham so desperately wanted children and they waited WAY longer than we ever did. They were really old when they finally had Isaac. And then God tested Abraham's faith to see if he was even willing to sacrifice his desires for what God wanted. God rewarded him for his faith. And see, your Daddy and I went through a lot of waiting for you. Soo many things that I don't want to go into in here, but we had to resign ourselves to the possibility of never having our dream of having kids as well. And because we chose to trust God and lay that down, He gave us you! So your middle name...it was meant to be! God knew you well before you were ever conceived, and He has a plan, a purpose that is just yours. You are known fully by the God of the Universe, and I hope we always lead you to Him.
It is a privilege to be your mother! I can't think of a greater privilege than to be yours and Alexandria's mom. You fill my life with more joy than you can ever know. So hopefully this helps you understand a little bit of why I am so proud of you. And why I love you so very much.
Happiest of birthdays to my Caleb Isaac. My best little man. My cuddle bug. My buddy. Here's to another incredible year! I look forward to making more memories!
Love,
Mommy (Your biggest fan!)
Tribute Video to my Caleb
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fkvNfmA3So4
